Tag Archives: infertility

Dear Pigtails & Cowlick,

I wanted to write you this letter, so that years from now, you will know how cherished and chosen you are.

Today was such a special day. One Momma and Daddy and all those who love you will never forget.

Today was Pigtails 3rd birthday.

Today was also the day you were granted legal freedom to join our forever family!!!

For once, Momma and Daddy woke up before y’all did, (of course you guys sleep in on school days and are bounding out of bed on the weekends…one Friday night when you want to borrow the car, I will remind you of that!) Incubator sent me a text saying she had seen 12 rainbows around her house this morning. It was a good reminder that, no matter what,  it was going to be a great day filled with God’s faithfulness.

Our serenade of “Happy Birthday” to Pigtails woke both of you up with such happy hearts. Mornings are always so sweet and snuggly in our house. Everyone got gummy vitamins for staying in bed all night! (Yes, we bribe you both fairly consistently.) You were Level 10 excited to see balloons and streamers everywhere. Cowlick could NOT wait to give Pigtails her presents because he was so proud of his gift-wrapping.

Your great-grandparents, Sugar and Sweetie sent a little gift for Cowlick so that he wouldn’t feel left out of the present opening. Cowlick, you couldn’t believe that on PIGTAILS’ birthday that YOU got to open a present TOO!! Cowlick, your gratitude was so innocent and loveable.

Momma and Daddy got crazy and let y’all eat sugary Dora cereal as a special treat. You both thought that was pretty stellar. We got you dressed and ready for Kindergarten and Mother’s Morning Out and you both bounced around the house singing “Happy Birthday” to each other.

At nursery school the ladies made a big deal of Pigtails…which of course you LOVED. And you didn’t cry when Momma left, so you got to play with Rocky, your favorite stuffed dog that Boonie, Nan and Larkin gave you. :)

I picked you up after work and asked you where you might like to go for a special birthday lunch…of course I already knew, but it was hands-down decided that “Chickalay” was your choice. We headed home for your nap and you went to sleep with a smile on your face because even though all day you would forget it was your birthday, I would remind you and you would light up like a Christmas tree saying, “It’s MY BIRTHDAY??? NOOO WAY?!?” and then you’d giggle and smile. You are such a joyful little jokester.

Daddy and I had a meeting with some amazing people at Cowlick’s school and all during the meeting we were complaining about the legal process dragging things out. LITTLE DID WE KNOW that at that exact moment our social workers, guardian ad lidem and Incubator were blowing up our phones trying to get in touch with us to tell us that WE WERE GRANTED TPR (termination of parental rights) and that you were legally free for us to adopt!!! My phone was dead and I didn’t think to put it on the charger until a few hours later…but when I turned it on I was overjoyed by the 18 text messages and 11 voicemails filled with the news! We all called Daddy and put him on speakerphone to tell him the great news. He got all choked up and teary and said he was leaving work early to come and celebrate!!

We headed out for a double-stroller walk and I picked up the phone to praise Jesus with Incubator!!! God had said YES to our (and YOUR) prayers!!! Our heart were filled with joy. And a touch of dazed shock. But tons of joy. It’s not that we ever really doubted you were ours…it was just that we didn’t know if the judge would be willing to rule in our favor…but he did. “The king’s heart is a stream of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it wherever He will.” Proverbs 21:1

Daddy’s car came barreling toward us and he started honking the horn and sticking his head out the window to holler at us with excitement. It was time to party! We went to Publix to pick up Pigtails’ birthday cake and then headed home to celebrate. Pigtails, you were delighted with your dollhouse and all the little furniture and people that Gigi and Hawk bought for you. You hardly would even talk to us the rest of the evening because you were so enthralled with the magical new world of playing dollhouse. I am glad you know that Mommies and Daddies like each other…

During dinner we tried to explain the concept of adoption and being a forever family. Y’all just looked at us like, “what on earth are you two getting all worked up about? Y’all are our mommy and daddy, why are we talking about this again?” In fact, we talked about y’all never having to leave and Cowlick said, “Well, I do have to leave because I have to go to school, Daddy.” Clearly this conversation was unnecessary because in your hearts and minds, our family had already become a done deal. And that was fine by us.

Before we knew it, it was bath time and bedtime. Cowlick, you are really learning to read, so you read your first FRED book to Daddy. And Pigtails, of course, you insisted on reading “all by yourself” too. I got the pleasure of having Pigtails in my lap jabbering and a front-row seat to watch my favorite boys sound out words. What a blessed momma I am! We rocked and put you in your beds (Pigtails, you, of course, spent a stint in time-out for throwing a fit) prayed, sang “Oh My Soul” and you both eventually nodded off to sleep.

Daddy had snuck out somewhere in there and had grabbed us some cheesecake and strawberries. We grabbed a blanket, lit the candles on the deck and sat enjoying the crisp Autumn air. We mostly just sat staring into the night and were kinda fuzzy-headed, but nostalgic about all that had brought us to this point. It was so crazy to realize that exactly three years ago at just the same time we were asking God to help us start a family, Pigtails was being born!!

What an incredible day. One that we will never forget. One that will, God-willing, be the beginning of sooo many more!

More birthdays, more memories, more praising Jesus for your lives. We are overjoyed (and still very overwhelmed) at the gift of you two. When people say we are “saints” for having opened our home to you, we laugh, because we know the truth of the matter is that YOU TWO are the ones that are blessing US and not really the other way around. YOU TWO are keeping us laughing, keeping us growing, keeping us on our knees.

Pigtails, your infection laughter and your playful free-spirit light up our life. Cowlick, your joyful, tender, brave soul and your literal, analytical fix-it man mind thrill us daily.

YOU TWO are the gift and we are simply the receivers.

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” James 1:17


Oh My Soul

We fell in love with this song at Greek Summit this summer. Watching 100 college students worship the character of God is a beautiful thing. It became a special song for us that we loved all through seminary classes, etc.

The first day Cowlick came to live with us the song came on the radio. Joel and I nostalgically looked at each other and smiled…but then our little man started singing it at the top of his lungs! Ask him what his favorite song is and he will tell you, “Oh My Soul”.

The first time we took the kids to church I said, “I wonder if they will sing our favorite song today at church?” AND…of course they did. To hold our babies in our arms and sing about the character of God ask they fearfully clung to us was a powerful thing.

Last night we sang this song as our bedtime song and today I’m going to sing it as a song to encourage my heart. I hope it will minister to you also!

Oh, and if you really want Ds full version it goes like this, “Bless the Lord Oh my Soul, Ohhhh my soul, Worship His holy name, Sing like never before, Oh my soul, keep your boat away!”